Written instructions of purchased products

On a Korean kitchen knife:  Keep out of children. (Something must have gotten lost in the translation)

On a string of Christmas Lights:  For indoor and outdoor use only. (As opposed to what, outer space ?)

On a food processor:  Not to be used for the other use. (Now I’m curious)

On an American Airlines packer of nuts: Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts. (Somebody got paid big bucks to writer this one)

On a Swedish chain saw: Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands: (Raise your other hand if you’ve tried this)